265 Pounds at 18, Nearly Died From Alcohol Poisoning, Cheated On, and Almost Gave Up. Now 110 Pounds Down (Here’s What Changed)

 Written by 

Julien Raby

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Matthew’s story begins with a memory most five-year-olds shouldn’t have.

Picture day. A shirt that won’t button. Tears streaming down his face because he knows he’s different.

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In a recent video that’s resonating across social media, fitness coach Matthew opened up about his lifelong battle with weight—a journey that started in kindergarten and nearly ended in tragedy multiple times before his eventual 110-pound transformation.

What makes his story remarkable isn’t just the weight loss—it’s everything he survived to get there.

When Food Became the Enemy (and the Only Friend)

Matthew’s earliest memory wasn’t learning to ride a bike or his first day of school.

It was standing in front of a mirror at five years old, unable to button his shirt, sobbing because he felt fat.

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The oldest memory that I have of myself is me struggling with my weight. If my life has been about anything, it’s been about weight loss and it’s been the main focus of my entire life.

The teasing started early. “Mattie the Fatty” became a nickname that stuck—not constant, but frequent enough to reinforce what Matthew already believed about himself.

His response? An obsession with superheroes that went beyond typical childhood fascination.

The Superhero Complex

Matthew didn’t just like superheroes—he desperately wanted to become one.

Why? Because he felt invisible, unwanted, overlooked.

I really think I wanted to be a superhero so bad because I felt like nobody actually wanted to hang out with me. And I felt like if I was a superhero, then people would love me.

The lengths young Matthew went to were both heartbreaking and revealing. He drew superpowers on paper with crayons and ate the paper hoping to absorb them. He collected feathers from a dead bird, taped them to his arms, and jumped off benches trying to fly.

He stood in front of mirrors for 30 minutes in his Superman costume, willing himself to take flight.

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FULL-BODY TRAINING

If you want something simple that actually works, this is one of the most effective tools I’ve used to build strength, conditioning, and endurance without needing a full gym setup.

  • Full-body training with one weight using swings, squats, and presses
  • Solid cast iron build that feels stable and lasts for years
  • Comfortable grip that makes high-rep workouts easier to handle

Football: A Brotherhood That Couldn’t Save Him

When Matthew discovered football in fifth grade, everything changed—temporarily.

He found what he’d been searching for: belonging, purpose, a path forward. The brotherhood of the sport filled a void nothing else could touch.

By seventh grade, playing for the East Side Milwaukee Steelers, Matthew felt athletic for the first time in his life. At 175 pounds, he played running back and linebacker—skill positions that made him feel capable and valuable.

Then eighth grade arrived with a crushing weigh-in: 200 pounds.

I stepped on the scale and I was 200 pounds. That scared the living shit out of me. All those insecurities I had about myself just started pouring back into my head.

That night, Matthew went home alone and did laps around his kitchen, super-setting pushups, stepping on the scale repeatedly until he saw 199. Anything to escape that “2” in front.

This marked the beginning of his toxic relationship with the scale—a relationship that would control his life for the next decade.

Build Strength and Conditioning With One Simple Tool
FULL-BODY TRAINING

If you want something simple that actually works, this is one of the most effective tools I’ve used to build strength, conditioning, and endurance without needing a full gym setup.

  • Full-body training with one weight using swings, squats, and presses
  • Solid cast iron build that feels stable and lasts for years
  • Comfortable grip that makes high-rep workouts easier to handle

The Position Change That Broke His Heart

Freshman year of high school at Marquette University High School brought another devastating blow.

Coaches immediately moved Matthew from running back to offensive and defensive line—positions reserved for bigger players.

He didn’t argue. He didn’t advocate for himself. He was too terrified they’d confirm what he already believed: he was too fat for the positions he loved.

It just made me feel fat. That’s what I thought about myself. I’m like look what you did to yourself. You were a running back and now you’re a lineman.

Around this time, Matthew discovered his escape mechanism: binge eating at his grandmother’s house.

The Cycle That Nearly Killed Him

What started as raiding his grandmother’s pantry during Packers games evolved into a full-blown coping mechanism.

Matthew’s brain learned a dangerous equation: stress + massive food consumption = temporary relief.

Build Strength and Conditioning With One Simple Tool
FULL-BODY TRAINING

If you want something simple that actually works, this is one of the most effective tools I’ve used to build strength, conditioning, and endurance without needing a full gym setup.

  • Full-body training with one weight using swings, squats, and presses
  • Solid cast iron build that feels stable and lasts for years
  • Comfortable grip that makes high-rep workouts easier to handle

By junior year, he weighed 265 pounds—his heaviest. He was skipping classes, lying in the football locker room trying to sleep, drowning in a toxic relationship, and facing academic failure.

His GPA hovered between 1.6 and 1.9. Later diagnosed with ADHD, Matthew couldn’t focus in class even when he attended. School felt impossible.

The Teacher Who Saw Him

One teacher, Mr. Feeley, pulled Matthew aside after reading a letter about his mental health struggles.

He told me that if I needed anything at all to talk to him. If I ever thought about hurting myself to talk to him. He was so real with me and told me that he had struggled with suicidal thoughts before.

Two years later, Mr. Feeley took his own life.

Matthew didn’t attend the funeral. He was too ashamed of how he looked in a button-up shirt to face his former classmates.

That decision haunted him for years—a stark illustration of how weight struggles can literally control every aspect of someone’s life.

Build Strength and Conditioning With One Simple Tool
FULL-BODY TRAINING

If you want something simple that actually works, this is one of the most effective tools I’ve used to build strength, conditioning, and endurance without needing a full gym setup.

  • Full-body training with one weight using swings, squats, and presses
  • Solid cast iron build that feels stable and lasts for years
  • Comfortable grip that makes high-rep workouts easier to handle

The Crash: When Everything Fell Apart

Matthew’s college experience was a downward spiral from day one.

UW Oshkosh offered unlimited cafeteria access, and Matthew took full advantage. Binge eating intensified. His weight ballooned. He stopped going to classes and workouts.

The pattern was vicious:

  • Binge at the cafeteria → Feel disgusting
  • Skip class out of shame → Fall further behind
  • Avoid football workouts → Gain more weight
  • Stay up all night on 1,200mg of caffeine → Accomplish nothing
  • Repeat

When sophomore year arrived, Matthew made the hardest decision of his life: he quit football.

Quitting football was like giving up on my life at this point. Football was my entire life. I completely lost my purpose.

His dream since childhood—playing in the NFL—died that day. The only identity he’d ever known vanished.

Rock Bottom Had a Basement

Matthew eventually dropped out of college and moved back home. He found work at an automotive factory on the night shift—9 PM to 7 AM.

Build Strength and Conditioning With One Simple Tool
FULL-BODY TRAINING

If you want something simple that actually works, this is one of the most effective tools I’ve used to build strength, conditioning, and endurance without needing a full gym setup.

  • Full-body training with one weight using swings, squats, and presses
  • Solid cast iron build that feels stable and lasts for years
  • Comfortable grip that makes high-rep workouts easier to handle

The job was soul-crushing. Wearing a strict uniform in a massive warehouse filled with deafening machine noise, Matthew performed the same repetitive task for 10-13 hours daily.

No conversation. No music. No humanity.

I felt like a robot just doing the same thing every single day. I had friends getting drafted to the NFL, which was my dream. And I was here living the shittiest life I could possibly live.

This period brought Matthew’s first panic attacks—multiple times daily, he couldn’t breathe, felt shivers up his spine, thought he was dying.

Depression became so severe that dark thoughts crept in regularly. Some days at work, Matthew genuinely didn’t know if he wanted to go home.

The Moment That Changed Everything

After quitting the factory job and moving back in with his mom for the second time, Matthew spent four months unemployed.

He binged daily—often consuming 10,000 calories. He gained 50 pounds in two months. He played video games all day, every day, hiding from the world.

Build Strength and Conditioning With One Simple Tool
FULL-BODY TRAINING

If you want something simple that actually works, this is one of the most effective tools I’ve used to build strength, conditioning, and endurance without needing a full gym setup.

  • Full-body training with one weight using swings, squats, and presses
  • Solid cast iron build that feels stable and lasts for years
  • Comfortable grip that makes high-rep workouts easier to handle

Then his mother knocked on his bedroom door.

She was balling her eyes out and she looked at me and asked me if I was going to kill myself. Seeing the pain on my mom’s face was the worst feeling I’ve ever felt in my entire life.

That moment became Matthew’s true turning point.

Not the scale. Not the mirror. Not even his own suffering.

Seeing what his pain was doing to someone he loved.

The Sustainable Comeback

Matthew’s successful weight loss attempt looked completely different from all previous tries.

Instead of extreme restriction (his previous diets ranged from 1,200-1,500 calories), he focused on sustainable portions and foods he actually enjoyed.

Build Strength and Conditioning With One Simple Tool
FULL-BODY TRAINING

If you want something simple that actually works, this is one of the most effective tools I’ve used to build strength, conditioning, and endurance without needing a full gym setup.

  • Full-body training with one weight using swings, squats, and presses
  • Solid cast iron build that feels stable and lasts for years
  • Comfortable grip that makes high-rep workouts easier to handle

Instead of brutal cardio sessions, he started with 10,000 steps daily.

Instead of an all-or-nothing mentality, he embraced imperfection.

I talk about not expecting perfection, aiming for perfection, but not expecting it. I want to be the best version of myself every single day, but I don’t expect to be the perfect version of myself.

Interestingly, that four-month period of unrestricted eating—while resulting in significant weight gain—actually helped reset his relationship with food. For the first time in years, his constant “food noise” quieted.

Building Momentum Through Small Wins

Matthew got a job at a gym. He started posting fitness content on TikTok in July of the previous year—three to five videos daily, every single day.

His content resonated. People listened. Engagement grew.

He began online coaching, helping others navigate the struggles he knew intimately. For the first time in his life, Matthew enjoyed his work.

Build Strength and Conditioning With One Simple Tool
FULL-BODY TRAINING

If you want something simple that actually works, this is one of the most effective tools I’ve used to build strength, conditioning, and endurance without needing a full gym setup.

  • Full-body training with one weight using swings, squats, and presses
  • Solid cast iron build that feels stable and lasts for years
  • Comfortable grip that makes high-rep workouts easier to handle

When his business showed promise, he took another risk: quitting his 9-to-5 to focus full-time on coaching and content creation.

Today, Matthew has lost over 110 pounds and kept it off—not through extreme measures, but through consistency, self-compassion, and refusing to quit.

The Real Lessons From a Life-or-Death Journey

Matthew’s transformation wasn’t about finding the perfect diet or workout plan.

It was about learning what actual self-love looks like—not affirmations in the mirror, but:

  • Following through on promises made to yourself
  • Pursuing goals even when the path isn’t clear
  • Forgiving yourself for being imperfectly human
  • Learning from failure instead of being destroyed by it
  • Trying again after every setback

He cycled through weight loss and regain countless times over nearly two decades. Each attempt taught him something new about what didn’t work.

The key difference in his final, successful transformation? He never stopped trying.

Build Strength and Conditioning With One Simple Tool
FULL-BODY TRAINING

If you want something simple that actually works, this is one of the most effective tools I’ve used to build strength, conditioning, and endurance without needing a full gym setup.

  • Full-body training with one weight using swings, squats, and presses
  • Solid cast iron build that feels stable and lasts for years
  • Comfortable grip that makes high-rep workouts easier to handle

If you just don’t quit, you can’t lose. I’ve been struggling with my weight since I was five years old. If you just never give up, eventually it will happen. It took my entire life for me to get to this point.

Why Extreme Approaches Keep Failing

Every time Matthew tried aggressive restriction—1,200 to 1,500 calories at 5’10” and 200+ pounds—he eventually binged.

The pattern was predictable: extreme deficit → rapid weight loss → unsustainable hunger → binge eating → shame → more restriction → worse binging.

His brain, trying to protect him from perceived starvation, drove increasingly intense food cravings. The “cheat day” concept—promoted by countless fitness influencers—became a gateway to multi-day binges.

Only when Matthew adopted a moderate approach with foods he enjoyed did the cycle finally break.

From Survival to Purpose

Matthew’s story reveals uncomfortable truths about weight struggles that extend far beyond calories and exercise.

His weight wasn’t just about food—it was intertwined with undiagnosed ADHD, childhood trauma, toxic relationships, identity loss, crippling anxiety, and untreated depression.

Build Strength and Conditioning With One Simple Tool
FULL-BODY TRAINING

If you want something simple that actually works, this is one of the most effective tools I’ve used to build strength, conditioning, and endurance without needing a full gym setup.

  • Full-body training with one weight using swings, squats, and presses
  • Solid cast iron build that feels stable and lasts for years
  • Comfortable grip that makes high-rep workouts easier to handle

Addressing the weight required addressing everything else simultaneously.

Today, Matthew’s business is growing rapidly. He’s helping others avoid the decades of suffering he endured. He’s building new goals beyond just maintaining his weight loss.

Most importantly, he’s living proof that rock bottom isn’t the end—sometimes it’s the foundation for something better.

I had this feeling in my chest that this life wasn’t supposed to be my life. That I was meant for something else. And that feeling kept me going because I knew I couldn’t quit.

That feeling was right.

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