Most men walking into gyms across the globe share a dirty little secret.
They think they’re training to look good for women.
But according to new research analyzing millions of workout sessions and surveying thousands of women, guys are missing the mark—by a lot.
Dr. Mike Israetel, co-founder of Renaissance Periodization and exercise scientist, recently broke down the fascinating disconnect between what men actually train and what women say they find attractive.
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What Men Actually Train: The Data Doesn’t Lie
Renaissance Periodization recently conducted a deep dive into their hypertrophy app data—literally millions of workouts logged by over 230,000 users.
The results were crystal clear.
If you want something simple that actually works, this is one of the most effective tools I’ve used to build strength, conditioning, and endurance without needing a full gym setup.
- Full-body training with one weight using swings, squats, and presses
- Solid cast iron build that feels stable and lasts for years
- Comfortable grip that makes high-rep workouts easier to handle
Men prioritize these muscle groups almost equally, in this order:
- Chest
- Biceps
- Triceps
- Shoulders
- Back
Forearms came in sixth, but at roughly half the priority of the top five upper body muscles.
Legs and abs? Way, way behind.
And here’s the kicker: Because RP app users tend to be more educated and nuanced about training than average gym-goers, the typical non-RP lifter probably trains upper body even more and legs and abs even less.
Published research backs this up. Mealey’s direct gym observation work and Newsome’s broader participation data both point to massive sex differences in muscle strength priorities and training behavior.
What Women Say They Actually Want
Here’s where things get interesting.
If you want something simple that actually works, this is one of the most effective tools I’ve used to build strength, conditioning, and endurance without needing a full gym setup.
- Full-body training with one weight using swings, squats, and presses
- Solid cast iron build that feels stable and lasts for years
- Comfortable grip that makes high-rep workouts easier to handle
In what Israetel calls “the most comprehensive research done on this topic to date,” researchers asked over 1,700 men and women which male muscle groups they found most attractive when developed.
Women’s stated preferences, in order, were:
- Obliques
- Glutes
- Abs
- Biceps
- Shoulders
Yes, you read that correctly. Glutes ranked second.
Triceps, calves, delts, quads, pecs, lats, and forearms all ranked lower. Dead last? Traps.
Women liked some upper body muscle, especially biceps and shoulders, but the very top of the list was not just huge chest, huge back, huge traps. It was obliques, glutes, abs, biceps, and shoulders.
Dr. Milo Wolf, exercise scientist, emphasized what this really means: lean waist, visible core, decent arms and shoulders, and actually training glutes.
Meanwhile, in the RP app data, chest is number one, triceps number three, back number five—but glutes sit all the way down at number nine.
If you want something simple that actually works, this is one of the most effective tools I’ve used to build strength, conditioning, and endurance without needing a full gym setup.
- Full-body training with one weight using swings, squats, and presses
- Solid cast iron build that feels stable and lasts for years
- Comfortable grip that makes high-rep workouts easier to handle
The mismatch is glaring.
Why Are Guys Getting It So Wrong?
According to Israetel, most men have zero direct insight into what women actually find attractive.
Instead, they guess. They infer. They hallucinate what women want based on what they themselves want to look like.
Most men have no earthly direct clue about what women actually like. So, what they do is sort of hallucinate what they think women actually want.
Almost no one reasons their way through muscle group selection scientifically. Guys just walk into the gym and blast upper body. Period.
When asked why, many say “for the ladies.” But when pressed on whether ladies actually prefer massive upper bodies, the response is more “duh” than “let me check the research.”
The reality? Guys train to impress themselves in the mirror. And because other guys are, well, guys—most men end up training to impress other men.
If you want something simple that actually works, this is one of the most effective tools I’ve used to build strength, conditioning, and endurance without needing a full gym setup.
- Full-body training with one weight using swings, squats, and presses
- Solid cast iron build that feels stable and lasts for years
- Comfortable grip that makes high-rep workouts easier to handle
The Gay Gym Paradox
Here’s where the science gets really fascinating.
Research from 1997 surveyed lifters at five gyms, including one specifically catering to gay men. The logic was simple: if men train to attract women, then men not oriented toward women should train differently.
They didn’t.
Gay men put the same disproportionate emphasis on upper body training as straight men. Their training tracked with being male, not sexual orientation.
Then, in 2007, Swami and Tovee had gay and straight men rate photos of male bodies. Both groups prioritized the waist-to-chest ratio—that famous V-taper—as the biggest driver of attractiveness.
But here’s the twist: Gay men rewarded stronger V-tapers significantly more than straight men did.
If you want something simple that actually works, this is one of the most effective tools I’ve used to build strength, conditioning, and endurance without needing a full gym setup.
- Full-body training with one weight using swings, squats, and presses
- Solid cast iron build that feels stable and lasts for years
- Comfortable grip that makes high-rep workouts easier to handle
Guess who prefers massive upper bodies on guys the most? Gay guys.
When researchers compared RP app data on what men emphasize against what women rate as most attractive, the correlation was essentially zero.
Stated Preferences vs. Revealed Preferences
Before anyone abandons chest day forever, there’s an important nuance to consider.
What people say they like isn’t always what they actually choose—especially depending on how and when they’re asked.
Israetel points out that studies using actual DEXA scans, full-body images, and 3D body models show somewhat different results than studies that simply ask women to rank muscle groups on paper.
When women view complete physiques rather than isolated muscle groups, preferences shift closer to what you’d see in men’s health magazines and romantic movies: athletic, broad-shouldered, lean-waisted male models—not mass-monster bodybuilders.
The research here does show notable patterns, though context matters. Studies using abstract muscle group rankings may not fully capture how women respond to complete physiques in real-world settings. Published work by Sell and colleagues found that women’s ratings of male bodily attractiveness are strongly predicted by how physically strong men appear—suggesting upper body development still matters considerably.
If you want something simple that actually works, this is one of the most effective tools I’ve used to build strength, conditioning, and endurance without needing a full gym setup.
- Full-body training with one weight using swings, squats, and presses
- Solid cast iron build that feels stable and lasts for years
- Comfortable grip that makes high-rep workouts easier to handle
Still, across multiple study designs, women consistently favor proportional development over extreme upper body mass.
Six Key Differences Between What Men Train and What Women Prefer
According to Israetel’s analysis, women idealize male physiques with at least six differences from what most men pursue:
1. Chest Thickness Isn’t Everything
Women appreciate broad shoulders, but don’t value massive pec thickness nearly as much as men do.
2. Back Width Over Thickness
While women love V-taper, they don’t prioritize massive back thickness or extreme width the way men do.
3. Arms That Match, Not Overpower
Women love muscular arms, but once arms are proportional to the rest of the physique, bigger doesn’t necessarily mean more attractive.
I mean, just for the record, I still think big arms can never be too big. I’ll absolutely die on that Lee Priest-shaped hill, but that’s just not what most ladies like.
4. Glutes Actually Matter
Women genuinely appreciate perky, round, visible glutes on men. Time to stop skipping glute-focused training.
If you want something simple that actually works, this is one of the most effective tools I’ve used to build strength, conditioning, and endurance without needing a full gym setup.
- Full-body training with one weight using swings, squats, and presses
- Solid cast iron build that feels stable and lasts for years
- Comfortable grip that makes high-rep workouts easier to handle
5. Abs and Lower Obliques Drive Attraction
Women love developed abs and especially that V-shape where lower obliques taper into the groin.
This is more about diet than training, but side bends with a single dumbbell (not balanced in each hand) can help develop that region.
6. Skinny Legs Are a Turn-Off
You don’t need to look like a powerlifter, but completely underdeveloped quads, hamstrings, and calves register as unattractive to many women.
The Takeaway: Balance Over Freaky Size
Israetel emphasizes that training to attract women doesn’t mean abandoning upper body work.
It means training lower body and abs more, and chest and back thickness perhaps a bit less. More balance. Less freaky, overdeveloped upper body.
Think local men’s physique competitor, not open-weight IFBB pro bodybuilder.
If you want something simple that actually works, this is one of the most effective tools I’ve used to build strength, conditioning, and endurance without needing a full gym setup.
- Full-body training with one weight using swings, squats, and presses
- Solid cast iron build that feels stable and lasts for years
- Comfortable grip that makes high-rep workouts easier to handle
But here’s what matters most: You don’t have to train to appeal to anyone but yourself.
Training to look how best pleases you will likely give you so much confidence that this confidence alone will get you more female attention than training exclusively for the ideal female pleasing physique and feeling kind of meh about it.
If you genuinely enjoy training for massive upper body development, own it. Your passion and confidence will likely be more attractive than any specific muscle group ratio.
However, if you do want to optimize your physique for what research suggests women find most attractive, the formula is clear:
- Get leaner to reveal abs and obliques
- Hit abs with focused training
- Train legs and glutes consistently
- Focus on shoulder width and moderate back width
- Develop solid arms that complement your frame
Will your heart scream at you to focus on raw upper body size instead?
Probably.
But according to the science, balanced development—not extreme specialization—creates the physique women actually prefer.
If you want something simple that actually works, this is one of the most effective tools I’ve used to build strength, conditioning, and endurance without needing a full gym setup.
- Full-body training with one weight using swings, squats, and presses
- Solid cast iron build that feels stable and lasts for years
- Comfortable grip that makes high-rep workouts easier to handle
Sources
- Durkee PK, Lukaszewski AW, Buss DM. “Pride and shame: Key components of a culturally universal status management system.” Evolution and Human Behavior (study on muscle group preferences)
- Sell A, Cosmides L, Tooby J, et al. “Human adaptations for the visual assessment of strength and fighting ability from the body and face.” Proceedings of the Royal Society B
- Swami V, Tovée MJ. “The muscular male: A comparison of the physical attractiveness preferences of gay and heterosexual men.” International Journal of Men’s Health, 2007
- Mealey L, et al. Direct gym observation research on training behavior and sex differences
